So, what, you just make dumb mugs?
We just make dumb mugs right NOW. We can see ourselves making other dumb things in the future.
Why are all these mugs $20?
Great question. We had absolutely no idea how to price our merchandise and thought, "20 bucks seems like a reasonable amount to spend on a dumb gift for someone." Then we harkened back to the good ole days of Beanie Babies and remembered how comforting it was knowing those lil guys were always 5 bucks. Therefore the equation of our pricing goes, (Beanie Babies X Inflation) + (Expenses - Lack of Knowledge) = 20 dollars.
But, the good news is our pricing includes FREE SHIPPING!
How long is it going to take to get my mug?
Well, we're not going to promise you Jeff Bezos quickness. That's why we probably won't become billionaires from this online business. We said PROBABLY not, not DEFINITELY not. We COULD become billionaires from this. Keep the hope ALIVE.
Anyways, shipping usually takes about 7-10 business days. We know, IT'S NOT FAST ENOUGH. You didn't know you wanted this mug, but now that you've seen it YOU'VE GOTTA HAVE IT. Put the iced coffee down, buddy. Have you tried CBD oil or weed?
***Be advised that shipping is taking longer than normal because of hold ups at the United States Postal Service. Be patient with our men and women in uniform, they're really going through it at the mo'***
What's your returns policy?
We just have one question for you. Why? Why would you want to return one of our mugs? IS IT NOT PRETTY ENOUGH FOR YOU?
Oh, wow. OK, we may have overreacted to your question. The answer is you can return the mug within 30 days of purchase if it's broken or there is a printing error.
Just send us an email at firstname.lastname@example.org and we'll help ya out.
My mug broke upon arrival wtf are you gonna do about it!?!
First of all, take a deep breath, it's going to be okay. We'll get through this tragedy together. Our mugs are so goddamn beautiful/inspired/timeless that they belong in a museum. We completely understand the pit of despair you are currently trying to dig yourself out of. The answer is shoot us an email at email@example.com and we'll try and make it right.
Or perhaps we won't, because you're making it up. WHAT? Why would you do that to us? Rude. Remember, we're unemployed!
Either way, send us an email and we'll help you out.
I don't think the image is 100% level, what gives?
There is always an element of human error involved in the print on demand bizz and mugs are no different. When they place the printing paper on the mug before heating, someone has to line the paper around the mug. Sometimes the end result might be slight off level. If it's way off just send us an email at firstname.lastname@example.org with a photo of the mug and we'll sort ya out.
I never got my mug. :(
Snap. Maybe your neighbor stole it. Once one of our aloe plants was stolen off our front stoop, and we almost had a conniption. We had that aloe plant for like 2 years. Again, shoot us an email at email@example.com and we'll sort it out.
If you happened to capture someone STEALING one of our mugs on your front door security camera, please, PLEASE, send it to us. We'll design an old timey WANTED poster for you to print and hang around your neighborhood. Shame is a great motivator.